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You. Me. Cosy little tomb with a view.
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HRMP! [Wednesday, October 18th, 2006 @ 12:42am]
Ok.. so I fixed my livejournal layout all by myself.. (ok ok, with Andy's help)

Only problem is.. I have no idea how to make my layout the same for my journal as well as for my friends page.. but I can't seem to figure it out.. and I'm tired of every time I go to look at what you guys have to say, I have to look at Mandy Moore... I'd rather look at Vincent.. *drools*

Any help? Thanks!
3 on the altar * marry me

I'm sick of feeling.. [Sunday, October 8th, 2006 @ 11:28pm]
I've gotten to the point where I've accepted this one little thing.. If people don't want to talk to me, then fine, don't talk to me.. in fact, stay as far away from me as possible because chances are, if we do talk, it's gonna be some lame assed bullshit where I have to smile my way through the conversation to keep from jabbing you in the eye with a pencil or some other sharp utensil.

I'm a very angry person inside. I sometimes wish I had the balls to show it. I'm tired of feeling like a not so important person in this lousy assed world. And ya know, if I were to go by other people's opinions, they would say something along the lines of, "Only you can make yourself feel like this.." which is complete and total bullshit. I put my all into my friends and my family.. and there are times when I don't get shit in return. If I even feign concern for someone, I get lousy replies. I get the, "I'm fine," reply.. which I know is bullshit, cause I know they're not fine. They're just saying they're fine because whatever is wrong with them may or may not have anything to do with me.. or, whatever is wrong with them may in some way have an affect on me. Ya know, that's shit. When I talk to people, people I love and care about.. granted, there are moments when I'll say things like, "I'm OK.." but it's not because it has anything to do with them. It's because it's something that DOESN'T have to do with them, therefore, does not concern them in that moment. It simply means, I don't wish to talk about it at that moment. And then people will get onto me about "not opening up enough." Which is bullshit too. Cause who's place is it to tell me when I should or shouldn't open up? The end result is usually the same anyway.. I open up about things and suddenly, people just begin to feel overwhelmed by my very existence.. it's like, "Oh.. she said how she REALLY feels.. and didn't slack off.. fuck, maybe I shouldn't have asked her to that.. maybe I didn't really want to know.." Because, hey, I'm sorry people.. I am who I am. I try to deal with shit on my own, but if I can't, there are a select few people in my life that I choose to turn to. And I only turn to those people because I feel like I can lean on them and they won't shove me away. But over the past couple of years of my life, I'm finding more and more that the ones I do turn to, end up turning away. Whether it's from the "OMG I can't believe that happened to you... I feel so bad for you.." factor or if it's the, "I just can't deal with a friend who's been through so much trauma in their life.." Whatever the case is, I'm sick of it. Ya know, people ask me to open up.. but then when I ask the same of them, do they do it? Fuck no.

So no more of this shit. I'm tired of it. Plain and simple. I love all of my friends more than anything, but I will not stand by and allow them to hold back some kind of pissiness they have for me. So here it is, you're only chance.. if you have something to say to me, then fucken say it. Don't hide behind some shield because you think, "Wow, she's been through so much.. and this is so trivial a thing to be upset about.. I really shouldn't say anything.. she doesn't need my bullshit.." Enough of that. Come clean, right fucken now.

Don't sit there and let me tell you exactly how I feel about things in your life.. and then you idly stand by while I'm doing something you don't approve up. Stand up for yourself for Goddess sake! I sure as hell would, so why wouldn't I ask anyone else to?

I stand up against her nearly every week nowadays, telling her exactly how I feel.. and when it comes to how she feels, she fucken backs down on.. All she ever says is, "Let it go.." Or "Let it be.." That's NOT what I want to fucken hear.

Stand up for your convictions. You feel something towards me, then say it. Don't back down from me because I get up in your face and say how I feel. I was RAISED to do that. Stand up to me and say, "Shut your fucken mouth you little bitch!" DO SOMETHING! For fucks sake. I would.. hell, I HAVE. I've stood toe to toe with her.. toe to fucken toe, saying "This is MY life, NOT yours! You deal with YOUR life and I'll deal with MINE! FUCK OFF!" But does she do that? No.. no no no.. Be tough. BE STRONG!

Fuck all that bullshit. This stupid shit where no one can say what they feel cause they might crack one or two damned eggshells.. SCREW THAT you guys! Step on every god damned eggshell you find. Stomp on those bitches till you feel better. Feelings may get hurt, but they can be repaired. It's crap to not stand up for what you feel.

So be honest. Be honest with yourself and be honest with me. And know, I'd do the same for you. I always try my hardest to be honest with people. Sometimes it can be hard because what I have to say may not be taken lightly.. but I guarantee that what I have to say will make someone think for days. Hell, what I have to say even makes me think for days sometimes.

Peace Out G's
3 on the altar * marry me

I love you guys! [Friday, October 6th, 2006 @ 2:00pm]
I love all of my friends dearly.. I really wish we weren't all going through some type of bullshit in our lives.. I wish there was a way for me to make it all better.. like, I wanna be able to wave a magic wand and take care of everyone.. Unfortunately, I don't have those kinds of powers..

Michelle: Whatever you decide to do, please know I am always here for you. I will back you up and support you in whatever decision you make. Just know I have all the faith in the world in you that you can do whatever you want. I know things have been crazy lately, I know you're wildly overwhelmed with so much shit. I love you more than you could ever know.

Renee: I know your FMS is getting worse.. even if you don't really talk to me about it.. I know you're hurting something aweful and I know the bills are flying out of control.. and things are just weighing you down.. Work is hard because of your FMS (not to mention it's Disney and I'm sure they take advantage of you since you've been there so long..), I know you want RJ to feel better too.. I know what kind of person you are.. you will suck up your own pain just to make someone else feel better.. I hope everything will be OK.. know that if you need me, I'm here. I love you sis.

Shane: There's always something isn't there hunny? The raging shifting winds of change keep ripping away.. yes, you're allowed to sing that out loud if you'd like.. I know if Michelle reads it, she will. ;) Anyway, I know it's tough for you.. living with your mom, dealing with the day to day stresses of job hunting and trying to get your life on track, not to mention that evil ex bitch of yours and what she's putting you through.. Believe me, if murder weren't illegal.. well, lets just not go there, shall we? The good news is, you have many wonderful friends (Cody, Ryan, Ron, Kat, Cel, me..) who want to be there for you. So you do not lack for a shoulder if you need one hun. Just remember that I'm one of those shoulders too. :) I love you.

Amy: You poor girl.. I want to hug you and squeeze you and call you George! Ok, so maybe not the George thing.. but anyway.. I know life is throwing a bunch of shit at you too.. you're having to make a very difficult choice.. a choice that just doesn't seem fair.. You keep hoping.. maybe, JUST MAYBE, things will change.. and maybe, just maybe, things will get better. I really hope they do. I really hope that everything will be alright. I want you to be happy, Aimes. I would really miss the crazy chick who makes me laugh my ass off if you got depressed.. But I want you to know, that even if you do get depressed, you can lean on me. Happy, sad or whatever, I'm here. I know we live a bit apart, but it's not like another state.. it's just like an hour away.. and we can hang, we can just chill, eat lots of junk food, watch stupid tv, whatever.. If you need to talk, I'll listen. I always have an open ear and an open heart.. not to mention an open mind, so I won't judge at all. I love you.

Steph: You poor thing.. I'm so sorry to hear about your job.. and your financial situation.. If I had a million dollars, believe me, I'd help out.. I really would. I wish I could. I know you and I aren't close, but you're one of my best friend's best friend.. *lol that made sense, right?* so by like 1 degree of seperation, you're a good friend to me too. I know if I ever needed you, you'd be there. And I want you to know you can count on me too. I know you're usually the goofy girl, the one who makes everyone laugh (even if you're not trying to.. hehe), but it's OK for you to be sad sometimes and it's OK for you to have down times. You pride yourself on being so strong, Steph.. it's OK for strong people to fall sometimes.. so long as you have people who are willing to catch you. I would like to be one of those people. I may not have money (cuz Goddess knows, most of my friends are poor broke just like me.. lol), but I'm a great listener.. even if you just need to vent about the shit you're going through, just know if you ever need another ear (I know you talk to Chelle and Nicole), I'll listen. I hope things get better.. I'm sure they will.. You'll pull right through, like you always do somehow. *hugs* Even tho we're not that tight, I love you Steph.

Christen: I'm not sure what you're dealing with right now.. I assume it's something to do with you and your significant.. and I'm sorry you're going through this. I really do hope things get better for you guys.. you've been together for so long.. And I want you guys to stay together.. I want him to realize what a great woman he has and not give up on your relationship. I wish you the best.. and I know we don't talk much, but please feel free to message me anytime if you need to talk. Much love.

That's all I can think of right now.. if I'm missing someone, don't get pissy with me.. My memories not all that great, so you have to forgive me.. and if you're not going through some crazy time in your life, I probably didn't say anything to ya. I love you all!!!!!!!!
1 on the altar * marry me

YES! It's about time! [Monday, October 2nd, 2006 @ 12:19pm]
It's finally October again.. Man, I feel like every year I just WAIT for this month to happen! October is ALWAYS a good month for me.. even if we're poor, I think we're gonna manage to scrounge up some money to go to HHN 16. We HAVE to. I mean, it's like a tradition for me. I've gone every year for like forever now.. I can't just stop. :P

Hopefully, with my paycheck this weekend and Andy's, we'll be able to get tickets. (Hint to all you Floridians: With a Coke UPC & being a Florida resident, you can get in for about $33..)

Then, of course, there's that almighty me wanting my costume already.. so here's hoping we can get money for that too.. before Halloween.. I don't even know why I'm bothering tho, considering I don't have any plans whatsoever for it.. maybe go to mom and dads and take the girls out.. One of these years, I'm gonna stop dressing up.. I just can't seem to help myself.

Not only that, but I'm HOPING Shannon and Jason will get in touch before Samhain so we can do a ritual together. It's always so much more powerful with the four of us, as opposed to just me and Andy.

That's about it for me for now. I'll catch you peeps latah!

Peace Out G's!
5 on the altar * marry me

haha I'm so NOT nerdy! Michelle, you should take this! :P [Saturday, September 30th, 2006 @ 2:28pm]
You are 16% white and nerdy.
How White and Nerdy Are You?
2 on the altar * marry me

hey Michelle.. [Saturday, September 16th, 2006 @ 3:48pm]
I stole one of your icons.. plz forgive me.. I'm too lazy to search all over the place for one of my own! :P Love ya!
1 on the altar * marry me

I am beginning to feel the loss.. [Thursday, August 31st, 2006 @ 1:58pm]
A part of me wants to cry.
A part of me has already died.
You're no longer by my side.
Do you want to tell me why?

You once stood beside me,
Helped me through all that I'd lost.
You were my mother, my friend,
You were there no matter the cost.

You've turned away from me,
Ran so far..
I don't understand,
Why you're not my mother anymore.

That vibrant woman
Who did everything she could
To make this world a better place
You always understood.

You held me when I cried,
Rocked me slowly back and forth.
Listened to my every word,
Loved me for all it's worth.

She disappeared so long ago.
I've always wanted her back.
She died inside when they did.
Her heart broken, she lost track.

I see a shadow of her soul,
Every now and then.
But I know she'll never be the same.
My mother, my friend.

She'll never be the woman she was.
She'll never love me the same.
She's gone now, possibly forever.
And now I start to feel the pain.

I've lost so much,
I've gained a lot.
To lose her now,
My heart feels lost.

I want to cry,
But I just can't.
I've fought so hard
To be who I am.

She once taught me
How wonderful things could be
So long as I relied,
I relied on only me.

I thought she was there.
I tried to see her in her eyes.
But everything she's ever told me,
Everything was just lies.

She died whenever they did.
And I know that now.
She'll never return to me.
So at last, I take that bow.

Goodbye mother dear.
I hope you're happy where you are.
Your only daughter,forgotten.
I never thought it'd go this far.

To the woman I once knew.
Who was bright as the sun.
I say goodbye to you now.
You've finally won.
1 on the altar * marry me

Boredom.. [Thursday, August 3rd, 2006 @ 1:35pm]
And no, I'm not copying it behind a cut.. why? Cuz I'm lazy..


01. televison show: Law & Order
02. flower: Gardenia
03. color: purple
04. sport: Hockey, if I have to choose one
05. mall: I don't care for malls.
06. music: Umm.. whatever
07. food: Italian or Chinese
08. season: Winter
09. animal: Dog
10. city: St. Augustine

01. hometown: Haines City, FL
02. hair color: Umm not sure.. reddish something
03. hair length: Not very long
04. hair style: Sloppy, cuz I just don't care
05. eye color: Blue
06. shoe size: 7 1/2
07. mood: pain
08. orientation: Straight
09. available: Nope
10. lefty/righty: right

01. have you ever been in love: yes
02. do you believe in love: yes
03. why did your last relationship fail: He had mental issues
04. have you ever been heartbroken: yes
05. have you ever broken someone's heart: I'm sure
06. have you ever fallen for your best friend: No
07. have you ever loved someone but never told them: Yes
08. are you afraid of commitment: No
09. have you ever kissed someone you liked: yes
10. have you ever had a secret admirer: Yes

01. love or lust: love
02. hard liquor or beer: Beer
03. night or day: night
04. one night stands or relationships: relationships that begin with one night stands *wink*
05. televison or internet: Ehh
06. pepsi or coke: diet Pepsi
07. wild night out or romantic night in: the latter
08. colored or black and white: I love B&W photography..
09. phone or in person: in person
10. aim or myspace: AIM

01. have you ever been caught sneaking out: no
02. have you ever skinny dipped?: no
03. have you ever done something you regret: No regrets
04. have you ever bungee jumped: no
05. have you ever been on a house boat: no
06. have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker?: no
07. have you ever wanted someone so badly it hurt?: yes
09. have you ever been caught by your parents with a hickey: yes
10. have you ever been caught by your parents doing it?: yes

01. are you missing someone right now: yes
02. are you happy: content
03. are you talking to anyone right now: Not technically
04. are you bored: Yeah, I need to take my lazy ass to the couch already
05. are you german: Partly
06. are you irish: PArtly
07. are you french: No
08. are you Italian: no
09. are your parents still married: No, my mother is a widow
10. do you like someone right now: I like lots of people

01. Person you hugged: Andy
02. Person you kissed: Andy
03. Person you called: Andy
04. Person who called you: Andy
05. Text message: Twink
06. IM: Jason
07. Place you went: Andy's parents
08. Thing you bought: Food
09. Person you talked to: Rhett.. after a wasp stung me...
10. Thing you drank: pepsi
marry me

*BLEH* [Monday, July 31st, 2006 @ 11:54pm]
I'm sick.. very sick.. Feels like I'm dying.. ok, I wouldn't know what dying feels like.. but anywho, I'm sweating, coughing, sniffling, stuffed up, head feels like it's about to explode and every body part I have is aching.. yeah, this is what death feels like warmed over..

Anyway.. quitting my job.. Macy's can die

2 on the altar * marry me

Incredibly long update.. [Sunday, July 16th, 2006 @ 11:32pm]
I've finally decided it's time to update this thing.. I have so much to say and I don't really want to sit here all day typing this out.. so be a friend.. read it and comment if you'd like. :P

This week has been sooooooooo effen crazy. First of all, as you all know, I started my new job. (Which I LOVE so far) The people I work with are all super nice and sweet and oh my Dorothy, we're not in Kansas anymore! Our area of the store is called Better Sportswear. Now then, I was told we have to dress nicer than the other employees.. however, I've noticed that after a couple of days, we all look the same anyway, so it doesn't really matter. I've been training mostly under a nice girl named Salene. (I was supposed to be shadowing Camille, but she and I rarely seem to work together) Our area has several different things in it: I.N.C., Ralph Lauren, Liz Claiborne, Charter Club, Tommy Hilfer and Multiple Choice. So each full time employee has their own little section. I ended up with Charter Club, which for me.. I have to say UGH to. Simple reason: Charter Club seems like mostly old lady clothes. And while it could be a great area to have to make some $$, I have to say I don't much care for the clothes.. so it may not be too easy for me to sell them to people if I'm thinking, "Goddess, that's the ugliest shirt I've ever seen!" But even tho I'm thinking it, I smile kindly and say sweetly, "Oh, that's a pretty shirt! It would look great with these.." and hold up a pair of pants/shorts/skirt/whatever. I smile politely, nod, and somehow convince this little old lady that this shirt and these pants would look divine on her. The entire time, I'm thinking, "I'd burn this before I'd wear it!" but hey, ya know.. it's all in their taste, not mine. So that's the easy part really. My second day, I busted my ass rearranging Charter Club, trying to make it look nice cause it was such a mess.. No one had really even gone through the area, so I had SO many price markdowns.. it was insane. I worked for 7 hours that day, and I'm telling you, the entire time, I was in Charter Club. I never even touched the register. Next day, I had like 4 hours of training to finish, so I did that. Then I was on the floor again, putting stuff away, helping people, yada yada yada. It was a good day, aside from my feet killing me. I finally bought some different shoes and Friday wasn't so bad. I've been off since yesterday, which has been nice. I have a 3 day weekend, then I work for 6 days in a row before my next day off. But really, I do like it. I'm sure it'll get easier, or maybe a little more difficult before it gets easier. We'll see. I'll keep you guys updated.

Moving on.. this is the stuff I really wanted to get into. It's my little section I'd like to call, Psycho Girl Harrasses Me. I don't know if I've mentioned much about a girl named Brandi who was staying with us for awhile. I met her a couple of years ago when she came over one night to visit with Rhett. I didn't like her then and I don't like her now. She moved in here because she had nowhere else to go, no one else wanted to help her. She got out of jail after spending 30 days there and she's also a drug addict. She said she was quitting drugs and going to rehab, so for the longest time of her staying here, I was being the nice person I am, helping her to get to her appointments and whatnot, being there when she cried or tried to hurt herself. She would do something stupid (like cut herself) and she'd cry on my shoulder. I basically babied her. I can't help it, it's who I am. Then came the weekend of my birthday, where she said she'd be here, but instead she went to Mike's (her uhh.. boyfriend/ex whatever). She said she'd be here, said she'd tried to get a cab, blah blah.. she never showed. She called me on my birthday, crying and saying she stole money from Mike and now he won't let her leave. Whatever. She came back, I forgave her, we moved on. Then a couple of weeks later, she tells me she's going to see her father. She hasn't seen her parents since she got out of jail and I told her I thought it would be a good idea to try and get things squared away with them. It's never good to have a shitty relationship with your rents. She said she was going to try and talk to her dad, see if him and her mom would help her. Welp, a few days later, I found out she wasn't at her dads, she'd never gone to her dads, she'd gone to Mike's instead. A lil piece of info: Mike likes to hit people and he demeans her by calling her names, etc. I'd been patient enough with her, I was sick of it. So, I told Rhett.. I said, "I don't care if she stays here, but I don't want to see her or talk to her for awhile. So she'd better stay in your room." Rhett called her and told her he didn't think it was a good idea for her to stay here anymore. I didn't expect that at all, but I was relieved. It meant I didn't have to put up with her anymore.

I know this is extremely long, but I felt like giving a piece of background info would be helpful in explaining this next part. At work, I believe it was my second or third day.. she called and left me a message. It went something like, "I just wanted to say thanks for getting me kicked out over absolutely nothing you fucken bitch!" and it went on, with several other curse words being involved and her calling me a fat, skanky assed, whoe. Yes yes.. me.. I'm fat, I'm skanky AND I'm a whoe.. I feel so honored to be called that.. it's been so long since I've heard it. (haha) Also mentioned in this particular message was her threatening my life. She said if I touched any of her shit, she would fucken kill me. Blah, so whatever. I laughed it off because honestly, I didn't care. Later that night, she called again, yelling and screaming at me some more about her being kicked out. She called again. I answered this time and the first thing I said was, "Lose my fucken number!" and she went in, immediately, and started screaming at me again. I tried to be calm with her, I tried to tell her I didn't get her kicked out, that her own stupidity did. She was screaming so much that I know she didn't hear a word I said. So I finally yelled, "Listen bitch! You're always telling me how NO ONE EVER FUCKEN LISTENS TO YOU SO SHUT YOUR GOD DAMNED MOUTH AND LISTEN TO ME!" Silence, finally. I told her again how I didn't get her kicked out. I told her exactly what I'd told Rhett and she continued to tell me Rhett said otherwise. "He said you went to him like the whiny little bitch you are and cried and whined and got me kicked out!" Yeah, pish tosh.. I didn't do shit to her. Of course, by this point, my blood was boiling and I began to scream back. I told her she shouldn't be threatening me. She then threatened me again, said if I touched any of her stuff, I'd better say goodbye to my "precious car." I told her how effen smoothe that is, to lay out empty threats like that to me. She then started saying how if I wanted to "throw down," we'd throw down. I proceeded to tell her to get her ass over here, that I'd be waiting. I hung up at some point, telling her to stop calling me. Michelle came over, I told her what was going on, she said next time Brandi calls, to let her answer. I was perfectly cool with that. I love my Michelle. hehehe So, Brandi calls back AGAIN.. and Michelle answers. I can't remember her exact words, but she said something like, "Nora's not available. Stop calling you stupid skanky bitch!" and hung up. Brandi calls again, leaves another message, saying stuff like, "You're not woman enough to face me, you have to have some stupid skanky assed bitch to answer your phone for you!" and she went on to say how if I wanted to throw down, I knew where she was.. yada yada.. That she wasn't scared of me.. which I'd already told her I wasn't scared of her. I even made fun, saying how she weighs like 70 lbs soaking wet.. yeah, I'm a dork when I'm mad. I was trying, for the most part, to stay calm.. all things considering, I know it doesn't help for me to get angry back because it's just giving her what she wants. She wants to try to get to me and that's what she was accomplishing by calling me every 10 mins. She called back AGAIN.. I answered saying, very calming, "This has got to stop, Brandi. It's getting old." and she then yelled at me some more, threatening me again, saying she had a gun and she was gonna shoot me. I remember laughing and saying, "Did you just say you had a gun?" Her: "You heard me the first time, bitch!" The conversation escalated again.. where she started saying she was gonna beat my ass.. She said if I wanted to fight her, I knew where she was. I responded with, "Brandi, I'm not the one calling you with empty threats. You're the one threatening me, remember? I NEVER called you and said I was gonna kick your ass, kill you, or destroy your property. YOU'RE the one CALLING ME! So if you want to fight, bring it on babe. Me and your stuff with be in the front lawn, see you in 30 mins!" At this point, it became about her stuff again.. if I touch her stuff, blah blah! I finally said, "Look, I don't give a shit about your stuff! Come and fucken get it!" She kept going, and Goddess help me, I must have blocked it all out.. cuz I don't remember what else she said.. she just kept going on, repeating herself.. like a dumb little child who doesn't think mommy is listening to them.. "Mom.. Mom... MOM!!!!" ya know what I mean. She kept going on and on and on.. this went on for some time, I was screaming that I wasn't scared of her, because she kept saying I was.. I kept saying that if she wanted me so badly, to come get me.. I may be short, I may not have a whole lot of weight to me.. but one thing I do know, if I could take on a 300+lbs man, I can take on Brandi. Michelle called the cops. Told them how Brandi had been harrassing me all day. I told Brandi that if she wanted her stuff, she could dig it out of the trash, cuz that's where it was going. She kept on about me touching her stuff and how she was gonna beat my ass.. Sheesh, it got old.. The best part, for me.. was when she decided to say shit about Andy.. How the only reason he's with me is because he can't get any better and how the only reason I'm with him in because he bows down to my every fucken need. I laughed.. She said, "What's so funny?" Me: "What's the matter Brandi.. jealous?" Her: "I'm not fucken jealous of you! Why would I be fucken jealous of you?!" Me: "Well, let's see here..." She started in again.. I said, "Shut the fuck up and listen!" She got quiet. I said, "I have a husband, who loves me and takes care of me. Whenever I want something, most of the time, I get it. He listens to me, cares about me and is there for me." She mumbled. I continued. "I have FRIENDS, who support me and love me and are THERE for me whenever I need them and even when I don't. They listen to me and I know they will always be there. I have FAMILY who supports me, loves me and doesn't push me away when times get hard. Oh yeah.. I have a VEHICLE.. I can go whereever I want, whenever I want because I have my own car. OH! And to top it all off, I have a JOB.. I make my own money, so I can get the things I want and or need.." I paused for dramatic effect.. she didn't say a word. I almost thought she wasn't there. I continued.. "And what do you have Brandi? A guy who fucken hits you and demeans you every chance he gets.. parents who basically disowned you and think you're a piece of shit.. you have no job, you have no car, you have NOTHING except a drug addiction and a dumbass for a boyfriend." She started to say something about how I'm not better than her, or whatever. It escalated again.. and I don't remember much after that. I eventually hung up on her again. Michelle was concerned. She'd never seen me so angry before. I don't generally get that mad.. But first of all, Brandi not only attacked me.. she attacked my husband and one of my very best friends. I don't go for that shit. I know at the end of the conversation, I said something about, "If you want me, come and get me. I'll be here all night." Needless to say, she never showed. The cop showed up, I told him what was going on, he called her and told her to stop calling me. She called Rhett, saying how "Your little friend Nora called the cops on me cause I was scaring her." I was like, whatever. If I were so scared, why would I say come on over? I mean, I didn't call her and threaten her life, her property, her husband, her friends.. she did it to me. Over the phone, not face to face. So who's the one who's afraid? She didn't stop calling. She called again later, crying and saying she was sorry.. and that her and Mike had gotten into a pretty bad fight. I called the cops again, had someone sent out to where she was to check on her. Yes, even tho she threatened me and is a total and complete whack-o, I still didn't want her to be somewhere where she was unsafe. I didn't want Mike to beat her to death or anything crazy like that. So I called the cops. She called me later and thanked me for calling them for her. I figure she was serious about the thank you because she didn't have that sarcastic tone in her voice. So, I'm a pussy for calling the cops on her for harrassing me, but I'm good samaritan for calling the cops to make sure she was OK. She called a few more times.. and then she called again on Friday, saying she was coming over to get her stuff. Rhett called the cops to be on standby for when she got here. While she was here, I went to the door, arms crossed and just staring at her. She stared back. It kind of felt like one of those old western movies where the guys take ten paces or whatever, then face each other to see who's gonna shoot first. I never turned away from her stare, she never turned away from mine. She finally said, "What's up Nora?" But she said it like sarcastically.. I just stared, not a word came out. The death glare, I'd like to call it. I said everything with my eyes. In that one look, I was saying, "Fuck off and die for all I care you stupid bitch. I don't care about you anymore." And I'm sure she got the hint. She picked up her stuff, walked away, put her hand in the air and said, "Peace Out bitches!" and left. The only other phone call we've received since then was her calling to tell Rhett he didn't give her all of her meds. Which, he did. No phone calls since then. Woo hoo!

The moral to this story is: Don't Fuck With Me. If you're gonna threaten me, you'd better back that threat up. Cause I'm not afraid of anyone. Ask anyone who's known me for awhile. I've never backed down. Would I have fought her if she'd come over here? If she'd thrown the first punch, you bet your sweet ass I would have. But I'm not going to jail for anyone. I'm not gonna swing on someone if they're the ones threatening me. I know the law. lol

Ok, that's it. Not so much a summary as I was hoping for.. but there was so much b.s. going on that I could really summarize it.

Peace Out G's!
marry me

Short update.. [Sunday, July 2nd, 2006 @ 6:51pm]
So last weekend wasn't so good.. or rather, this past weekend. Short update, cuz I'm sooo not in the mood to update.

Friday night we got a call from Andy's mom. (This, of course, is after I just found out my cousin has cancer) She says we need to get to the hospital this weekend because they're not expecting Andy's great-grandfather to make it through the weekend. We said ok and planned to go on Sat. Not too long later, I receive another call saying, "Nevermind. Grandpa just passed." So.. Andy's great grandfather passed away on Friday. It wasn't a shock to any of us, considering the man was 98 years old. He lived a nice, loooooong life.. and everyone is grateful for that. Andy's Grandma is taking it hard (he was her father) but she seems to be holding herself together pretty well, all things considered. After I got the call, Michelle called her mom to check on her grandfather (he's been sick) and her mom said everything was OK at that time. I'm not kidding you guys, about 2 hrs later (I could be wrong on the 2 hrs, it may have been sooner) her mom calls back and tells her that her grandfather just passed away. In the SAME night! So yeah.. Andy's great grandfather and then Michelle's grandfather.. *sighs* What's next?

The End. Hurrah.
1 on the altar * marry me

Quick update [Thursday, June 29th, 2006 @ 5:48pm]
Got a phone call from my Aunt Minnie today. She told me to come over ASAP because she needed to tell me something and she didn't want to tell me over the phone.

So I go over there.. And she tells me my cousin Bonnie has breast & cervical cancer and the doctors aren't sure she's going to be OK once everything is said and done. My Aunt is moving back to Punta Gorda ASAP and my Uncle will stay with my mom till Jan., then move back as well. Which means, my mom will be left alone in that house with David. John Levy refuses to live IN the house, because my father slept in both rooms at some point in time. I can understand that. I guess Maggie and John are going to stick around for a bit, to help mom with the bills. And with all this info, I'm suddenly overwhelmed again. I'm sad about my cousin, sad about my Aunt and Uncle leaving.. but mostly sad because it still seems as if my mother has abandoned her family for some guy. I absolutely hate it. My Aunt needs her.. and she's gone. Bonnie has always been a favorite in our family. She's bright, she's funny, she's just an awesome person all around. I'm hoping she'll come through this with flying colors. She is, after all, one of the strong ones.

I keep thinking about what things could happen in the future.. Aunt Minnie and Uncle Doug gone, my mom may feel like she can't handle the bills (even with Mag and John's help) and she may decide to just give me the house and pack up and go back to Maine. *Shrugs* Honestly, I've thought about it.. I've thought about it a lot.. and I don't want the house. I don't want to go through all of the shit in those sheds out in that yard, I don't want to fix up the house to make it look decent, I don't want to clean the yard.. because if she leaves, this will all be left to me.. and I don't want it. Yes, it's my father's house.. the house I grew up in.. and I will always remember that house as a very special place to me. But at the same time.. it's the house we lived in when my brother died, the house my father died in.. that house has so much sadness in it, I don't think I could ever live there again. It's hurts so much to even think about the possibilities of what COULD happen if my mom decides to leave. It's her choice, she can do what she wants. The family already feels completely abadoned by her. Even when she's here, she's not here. If that makes any sense. She doesn't seem to care about anything but David. Everything is about him. And I don't want a house that my mother brought another man into anyway. I'd think about that too. I don't know.. this is all on the "What if" scale.. so it doesn't really matter right now. I'm just venting.

In other news.. it's been a year since I've had a job.. and no, I'm not looking forward to going back to work.. but I do have a job interview next week for Macy's. Anyone got some nice clothes I could have? lol Cuz I certainly don't. And I don't have money to go buy new clothes to look decent for this interview.. *sighs* Oh well, I'll give it my best shot. Nervousness, here I come!

Peace Out G's!
marry me

Thanks again Mur! I didn't get the same as you! :P [Wednesday, June 28th, 2006 @ 9:09pm]

What level of divine power do you have?

You are one of the Undying, the immortal beings that would stand beside the gods, had they not been bound to the material world by people.
Take this quiz!

Quizilla |

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marry me

Hmm.. this was fun.. thanks Mur! [Wednesday, June 28th, 2006 @ 9:03pm]

What is yours?
Explain yourself
Culinary: Spaghetti Something about spaghetti that just makes my mouth water, no matter how many times a week I eat it!
Literary: Laurell K. Hamilton I love her books! I've always been big into vampires, werewolves and the such. Her Anita Blake novels are a mix of a kick ass chick and a bunch of hotties.
Audiovisual: Movies in general I'm a huge movie buff. I'll pretty much sit down and watch a movie at least once, even if I don't like it.
Musical: Insane Clown Posse Even if other people think they're absurd or stupid, I can't help but love them. They make me laugh (a lot sometimes) and I've been a fan forever.
Celebrity: Vincent D'Onofrio *drools* Maybe it's his character on Law & Order CI, Robert Goren, that makes me sweat so much. A man in a suit who has the ability to put things together without even really trying.. something sexy as hell about that!

Now I tag:-

sweetattrition ruinedromantic myoosikal be92 and phoenixthegrey

to complete this same Quiz, Its HERE.
marry me

Birthday [Monday, June 26th, 2006 @ 7:17pm]
I posted a bunch of pics from my bday on my myspace.. if you don't have myspace, sorry, but I'm way too lazy to post them on here too. lol The End! Great bday!
marry me

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